Caesar (Gary): Welcome, welcome, welcome to Week 2 of the BBB Games Pregame Show! Ha ha ha ha ha! We have an excellent show for you today. Week 1 gave us some rather surprising results. NFL scoring was way down. So many in our League felt it, with nearly half the League failing to reach 100 points. With some unfortunate injuries, the waiver wire was hot, hot, hot this week. We'll break down the latest pickups and the latest power rankings. Let's get started, shall we?
Claudius (Paul): We shall.
Caesar (Gary): So, Paul. You had a very lackluster performance with Kelce out last week. How are you feeling about your team?
Claudius (Paul): No worries. Kelce is coming back this week to stomp the Commissioner!
Caesar (Gary): Yes, yes. We all hope so. I must say you were fortunate to get the win, facing the Poopsie winner for the lowest score of the week.
Claudius (Paul): A win is a win. It's my year.
Caesar (Gary): Well, the latest Power Rankings seem to agree with you. Let's take a look.
Power Rankings:
Paul
Commissioner
Jordan
David
Justin
Dana
Gary
Travis
Steve
Tracy
Ashlyn
Linda
Caesar (Gary): Any surprises on the list for you, Paul?
Claudius (Paul): Steve's team is way too low. He just picked up Nacua, who was a beast in Week 1. Who knows if Kupp will come back this season? He just posted the high score this week! I don't understand how he is 9th.
Caesar (Gary): It is puzzling. I thought Dana would have picked him up, but she still has issues figuring out how to use the NFL app without the Commissioner's help. What isn't surprising is seeing Linda at the bottom. What was she thinking dropping Higgins after one bad game?
Claudius (Paul): She wasn't. That's her problem.
Caesar (Gary): Well, it's a problem for all of us since Jordan has the #1 waiver priority. He will gladly use it to add Higgins to his team.
Claudius (Paul): Indeed.
Caesar (Gary): There were some significant injuries in Week 1. Ashlyn lost Dobbins. He was performing well for her but couldn't stay healthy. Looks like his NFL career is over, along with Ashlyn's hopes of repeating as BBB Champion. Her running backs are thinner than the citizens of District 12. She whiffed on her Penny and Gibson draft picks. Shame.
Claudius (Paul): Yeah. We all like Ashlyn. Poor girl has to have the Commissioner as her father.
Caesar (Gary): Travis got a 0 from Rodgers after he tore his Achilles after just four plays. Old age claims another victim in the NFL. It cost Travis a chance of winning, but more importantly, it tanks Garret's value for Jordan.
Claudius (Paul): Jordan will slide Higgins into Garrett's spot. It's better to be lucky than good.
Caesar (Gary): That's a true statement, Paul. Gary won this week over Travis, but he may have taken a big hit if Ekeler's ankle injury was a high ankle sprain. His running back depth is as thin as Ashlyn's.
Caesar (Gary): Now, let's look forward to the Week 2 matchups. The game of the week is between the Commissioner and Paul. Paul, we know you always look forward to the opportunity to beat the Commissioner. Unfortunately for you, he has a 10-4 lead in your head-to-head matchups.
Claudius (Paul): Yeah, he built up a sizeable lead, but I've had his number here lately. Kelce will play this week, so that gives me the advantage. Did you see the dumpster fire performances by the other Tight Ends last week?
Caesar (Gary): Yes, yes. The Commissioner is desperate to find receptions at his Tight End position. I see he dropped Friermuth for LaPorta. Are you concerned LaPorta could get a lot of targets this week?
Claudius (Paul): Am I concerned about a rookie Tight End? Pa-lease. I'm going to relish this victory.
Caesar (Gary): I hope it comes to fruition. Next up in the Beards Division is a matchup between Justin and David.
Claudius (Paul): The proverbial David vs. Goliath.
Caesar (Gary): After a disappointing loss to the Commissioner in Week 1, David looks to bounce back against the 3 time BBB Champion. Two Top 5 ranked teams battling it out to get their first victory of the year. It's a close matchup, but I have to give the edge to David with Allen to come out on fire against the Raiders after a poor performance against the Jets.
Claudius (Paul): You can never count out Justin. It seems he wins the Belt every other year, but his team feels limited this year.
Caesar (Gary): Travis will want to spend more time in the bar car after this week. After barely missing the Poopsie last week, he will have a difficult time against Tracy. The FantasyPros analysts have Travis winning, but I have to agree with the NFL projections. Can you win with Pitts as your TE? I don't think so.
Claudius (Paul): Me, either.
Caesar (Gary): Speaking of the bar car, I may join Travis after this week. If Ekeler doesn't play, I am screwed! Christian Kirk only plays on 3 wide receiver sets. JSN is still getting up to speed. Skyy Moore is Skyy Less. My team is already tanking. The least the Chiefs can do is win this week against the Chargers.
Claudius (Paul): I'm rooting for it.
Caesar (Gary): Ah, the Battle of the B*****. This game comes down to matchups. Linda made an excellent waiver wire move, picking up Kyreen. Unfortunately, he faces the 49ers this week. Brutal. She is dead in the water if Aaron Jones is out with his hamstring injury. Dana will find out soon if Najee is a bust or not. I can't fault him for not performing against the 49ers D. The Browns D looked pretty good last week, too. Just ask Burrow. I like Dana to start 2-0. Did you see what the Dallas D did the previous week, scoring the 2nd highest single-game total in fantasy history? Now they get to face the MILF Hunter in New York. The Dallas D could set a new single-game points total by a defense this week! Too bad she whiffed on getting Nacua.
Claudius (Paul): Shame.
Caesar (Gary): This brings us to our final matchup in Week 2. Ashlyn vs. Steve. It's not looking good for the kid. Her team is no pushover, and Tyreek isn't going to have 200+ receiving and 2 TDs every week. Belichick will clamp down on Hill, but Hill is too good to be shut down completely. Steve's team is a bit better at almost every position now that he grabbed Nacua, although Nacua faces the 49ers, so this is not the best week to start him. Cousins plays on TNF, so Ashlyn could pull off the upset if Prime Time Kirk shows up. Not likely, though, since Geno turned back into a pumpkin.
Claudius (Paul): Is that it?
Caesar (Gary): That's it. We're done here. Good luck to everyone in Week 2!
Claudius (Paul): Bye-bye.
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