Hi Ho! Just one more week to go before the playoffs. What a year it has been so far. Steve pulls off a major upset against Jordan to almost seal the deal for his first Championship playoff appearance. Ashlyn has four key starters on bye next week, so it will be tough for her to beat Jordan, and she still needs Steve to lose to Loser Linda, which is even harder to do. David secured his ticket to the Championship playoffs with a low-scoring win over Gary. My jinx helped him. I tried my best to jinx my brother, but we are both sons of a voodoo priestess, so he has the power to counter jinxes. Dana has won 5 straight but will still be in the Crapper playoff. With David winning the Bros division and Steve practically punching his ticket, she has to win next week and outscore Tracy by 87.45 points. She's fought back from a 1-7 start but hopes her team can continue to roll to avoid sitting on the Crapper. It's TBD who gets relegated in the Beards division. Currently, Paul is leading Travis by 1.62 points. I thought there would be a stat correction for the final play as ESPN mobile had the total yardage as 294 before the last play, which went for 10 yards. However, the official box score shows 298 yards total, so Travis lost by 2 yards. Ouch. So it looks like Travis returns to the Bros division. Taking his place will be my son, David, who has ascended from sitting on the Crapper twice to the best Division in the League. One thing is constant in the Beards division. Me! For eight years straight, I've remained while others have come and gone. Jordan and I have locked in the bye as the #1 and #2 scoring team. Gary is 85.60 points behind me. My poor Week 13 points total hurt my chances of catching Jordan. He has dominated the Total Points race this year. Onto the matchup recaps.
Kermit the Kommissioner (James) vs Gonzo the Great (Justin)
103.06 - 143.78
I punted this week's matchup to get my DSTs for the playoffs. It wouldn't have mattered if I had tried to put my best lineup together. I was outclassed this week. Henry got the game scripted out of the game. That is always the danger with the Titans' offense and Henry. The Eagles manhandled them. Batman, aka A.J. Brown, also got his revenge against the Titans. 119 and 2 TDs! Holy moly, Batman! I tried to counter Garrett Wilson with Mike White, but White decided to throw INTs instead of TDs. Garrett is a target monster! I took a big hit to my playoff odds with the injury to Lamar. We will see if he can get healthy by Week 16. As of now, Mike White is my only hope. I'm in trouble. Justin makes the playoffs again. Could he get a 4th Championship? I wouldn't bet against him. His teams tend to get hot in the Playoffs. I'm just looking forward to my matchup against Paul next week.
BoBo the Bear (Steve) vs Elmo (Jordan)
142.40 - 124.20
Steve's team is heating up when it counts the most, while Jordan's team continues to stutter due to poor lineup decisions. This week he benched the 49ers for the Pats. That cost him 14 points. He benched Cook for Kamara. That cost him 10.6 points. 24.6 points total. He lost by 18.2. Maybe he wanted Steve to make the playoffs over Ashlyn since she has scored more. You never know with Jordan. He's a schemer. It takes a schemer to know a schemer when he sees one. It's what I would have done. Steve should have contended for a high score, but for some reason, Chubb has been the only RB not to go off against the Texans. Steve has done a good job of grabbing WR talent off the waivers. Too bad he can only start 3. Deebo, Watson, McLaurin, Samuel, and Gallup posted double-digit points. It's a nice problem to have. Now Swifty is going off on his bench. Steve could be trouble in the playoffs. He has a sneaky good team, as I've said before.
Abby (Ashlyn) vs Janice (Linda)
170.49 - 101.74
Ashlyn may not make the Championship playoff in her Rookie season, but she won't be sitting on the Crapper, either, thanks to her high points total. As a consolation prize, she got a high score this week. She remembered her DST strategy this week and grabbed the Browns' DST, which got not 1, not 2, but 3 DST TDs against Houston. Wow! Too bad she forgot last week against Steve. Rookie mistakes. It was a perfect week for her as she watched the Bengals beat the Chiefs live at Paycor Stadium and get a high score. It doesn't get much better than that, other than missing out on a chance for the Championship. I am proud of her effort in the League in year 1. She's learned a lot in her first year. As for Linda, once again, she finds herself fending off the Crapper for the 3rd time in four years. It's become a tradition.
Mother Tucker (Dana) vs Oscar the Grouch (Tracy)
142.36 - 133.60
Dana played a spoiler as she knocked Tracy out of the chance to play for the League title. Now he is in danger of getting relegated to the Broads division. How the mighty have fallen. The win doesn't help Dana avoid the Crapper playoff, but she can finish the regular season without a losing record. She has a lot of pride. To avoid being relegated back to the Broads she needs a win next week and a loss by Tracy. Her five-win streak has resulted from the tear Davante Adams has been on. He is now the #1 WR to date in fantasy. The pick she felt was a mistake and put her on tilt during the draft has ended up being a great pick. You never know. But her waiver wire RBs saved the day in Week 13. Perine got another start, with Mixon still out with a concussion. Perine is underrated. He tore up the Chiefs for 100+ rushing and almost 50 receiving. Bam Knight lived up to his nickname with 16.8 points. 40 points from the waiver wire. That's impressive at RB. She whiffed at TE, though. Weird Al showed up after she dropped him while Henry did nothing versus the Bills. Her Steelers D also whiffed against the Falcons with only 5 points. I'm glad we don't have to face Jacobs or the Sun God in the Championship playoffs.
Animal (Paul) vs Dr. Honeydew (Travis)
109.72 - 108.10
It doesn't get much closer than this matchup. It came down to 2 yards. The Bucs D ended up finishing the game with 298 yards allowed. 2 more yards, and they would have lost 3 points. It wasn't meant to be for Travis, as he gets relegated back to the Bros division. Paul gets to hang around and face me twice again next season. Once again, having the #1 TE doesn't help you win Championships in our League. Kelce has nearly double the points of the 2nd highest TE, and Paul still has a losing record. Travis accepting the Pittman for DeVonta Smith didn't work out well.
Fozzy the Bear (David) vs Scooter (Gary)
95.60 - 89.62
Two teams that probably don't deserve to go to the Championship playoffs, but here we are. David clinches the Bros division with the win. With Tracy's loss to Dana, Gary holds 2nd place for his ticket to the dance. David was saved with a late waiver wire grab...Jared Goff posted 300+ and 2 TDs for 26.6 points. My gift to David continues to be so reliable. This week, Diggs went for almost 100 yards and a TD. Ho hum. I thought Gary would come from behind during the Bengals/Chiefs game, but the Kelce fumble derailed it, as the Chiefs only mustered 38 yards afterward. Live by the Chiefs super stack...die by the Chiefs super stack. I wouldn't count Gary out for the title. The Chiefs face Denver, Houston, Seattle, and Denver to finish the fantasy season. Juicy
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